July 28 2010

Not too much interesting as far as horses today but there was a really interesting horse owner that came in. Interesting is the word you are supposed to also use in surgery when you accidentally slash open an artery or puncture a bowel instead of your normal reaction of woops! Or ough-oh! Just calmly say interesting...and then go about frantically fixing whatever went wrong. I’ve seen surgeons in Purdue use it and it is surprising how much it helps you rather than wasting energy and focus on swearing and pitching a fit.
It was after hours about 7 or so and I was hanging around reading or killing time for some reason. An old truck and trailer pulled up and a short fat middle aged lady unloaded a old paint horse that was a rack of ribs. She had came down from Utah somewhere and was quite distraught about the horses swollen penis. It looked pretty bad because it had become swollen and unable to retract up in to his prepuce so it had gotten pretty beat up by exposure to the sun and elements. He had what is called a reefing surgery a few years back because of a tumor on his prepuce that they remove a bunch of of the skin all around the penis. I suspected that he potentially had complication secondary to that or perhaps he had some cancer as well but the thing that made it look bad was the swelling and the sunburn and exposure damage to the light colored skin.
Anyway getting back the the lady. She was clad like most in the desert. A spandex aerobics like top under some kind of spaghetti string over shirt that the strings wouldn’t stay over he shoulders and slid down to her elbows most of them time. She was quite a large woman too, I’d say about 5 foot and 225 pounds or so. So there was lost of gross skin all over the place. She was quite crazy really I could tell from the start when she babbled on about how this horse was full of worms and she had beed up since 6 Utah time and really tired and her AC was broken. The first thing she wanted was the hurry and get this horse hosed down because he was really in bad shape and over heating. The horse looked fine to me, just thin and a big swollen sun burned penis. I just figured it couldn’t hurt anything but I was wrong. I gave her the hose and walked over and turned it on and when I turned around and she had the hose up over her head just hosing herself down. I could believe what I was seeing in the way she did it was like you would expect to see in the movies where there would be music playing and in slow motion the female actress would be turning and acting sexy as the water poured all over her. I just stood there in amazement. When the lady was done hosing herself thoroughly she put a little on the horses back for about 10 seconds and said OK that enough and I turned it off. Now she is soaking wet from her hair to her toe and there was a disturbing amount of wet skin hanging out all over.
Slightly traumatized I put the horse in a stall and told her to park the trailer over there and went to try and forget what I just saw but as you can tell I haven’t been able to. I came out a while later thinking she would be long gone and she was over in the parking lot lifting and heaving at the hitch of her little steel 2 horse trailer. She saw me and quickly yelled I don’t know how this stupid thing works. I assumed there was some sort of malfunction and went over to help. It looked like it was all undone and I couldn’t figure out what her hold up was. Then she said I have been lifting but I don’t
sorry about the copy paste error
Cont.
Then she said I have been lifting but I don’tknow how to get it off. It was a normal bulldog hitch and it was all unlatched so I reached for the jack and she said,”now what is that, what does that do.” I didn’t look at her this time I just started turning it and jacked up the trailer I learned my lesson last time. I made sure she could drive away safely and thought to my self...interesting. Hopefully I won’t be around when she comes to pick her horse up but I will be floating his teeth on Monday.